Sunday, September 25, 2005
who am I? who am I?
pernah ga ngerasa kita kayak ga kenal ma diri kita sendiri? wondering whether we've turned out to be someone DIFFERENT, someone who doesnt even know who she is, what does she want in life....someone NEW
rasanya aneh, campur aduk, berasa kaya orang yang baru lahir ke dunia, ignorant. yang bikin parah, kita sendiri ga tau apa yang bikin kita jadi kaya gitu....lingkungan? temen temen? keluarga? studies? pacar? could be anything....we dont even know if we've turned out to be a BETTER or WORSE person....what should be blamed? who should be blamed?
It's suck to have such a who-am-I kinda feeling. It's like a currency though, fluctuating overtime. Let's put it in an economic way. For those of you who are not familiar with the terms I'm about to use, please refer to this so called Economic for Dummies. Borders should have one :p Like a currency, when it appreciates, it feels like you perfectly know who you are. You feel strong. You feel like you're still the same person as you used to be. You know exactly how you perceive yourself. But when it comes to depreciation, again like a currency, you feel weak. You feel like your Achilles heels are exposed. You feel lost. Ignorant. The more you devote yourself to think about it, the more it is likely you are getting lost in your own thoughts.
But you still have one last resort. The ONE that has helped you thousand of times before. The ONE whom you turn to when you're down, and ironically the one whom you leave out when you're up to the sky, pathetic. But no matter how cruel you treat Him, He will always help you because He loves you, as simple as that.
"Ya Allah, tambahkanlah cahaya padaku, berikan padaku cahaya, jadikanlah cahaya untukku, dan jadikanlah aku cahaya". Amin
INNE ssstt.... |
